Arena: Weegee (Seating Capacity: 689)
Asst GM: Ed Gein
Coach: Rocky Dennis
Three time Palucci Cup champion
Acquired Picks: Lopezers 11th round (2025-26) Knee 13th round (2025-26) Cobra 17th round (2025-26) AV 4th round (2025-26) AV 5th rnd pick (2026-27)
As Mr. Phil Miozzo steps into the big leagues, the hockey world is abuzz with skepticism and intrigue. Mr. Miozzo, who has confidently proclaimed that he will capture the Palucci Cup in his first year as an expansion team, faces an uphill battle. His success in smaller leagues doesn’t necessarily translate to dominance in Houndog Hockey’s more competitive arena.
Mr. Miozzo’s track record, marked by victories over lesser competition, raises questions about his ability to handle the high stakes of top-tier hockey. The claim that he will easily secure the Palucci Cup seems ambitious, given the significant step up in competition. Many General Managers are eagerly awaiting to see what rookie mistakes Mr. Miozzo might make, ready to pounce on any missteps.
Last season (2014-15), Mr. Miozzo’s victory was perceived by many as a fluke. His seemingly haphazard drafting strategy and reliance on luck have been criticized, with some pointing out that Team Dalton’s premature exit played a significant role in Mr. Miozzo’s success. The general consensus among critics is that Mr. Miozzo’s triumph was more about favorable circumstances than strategic brilliance.
Adding to the drama, Mr. Miozzo’s unique and often mocked musical creations—such as “Babooms” and “Boomshackalacks”—have only fueled the skepticism surrounding his capabilities. There is a growing anticipation that these eccentricities will be overshadowed by a subpar performance, with many predicting that his team will languish at the bottom of the standings.
Meanwhile, Team Dwarf has made headlines with the announcement of their new Assistant GM, Big Bobby Clobber. Speculation is rife that Clobber played a crucial role in the controversial asterisk win by Team Dwarf last season. The involvement of Clobber has sparked debates and investigations into the legitimacy of last year’s outcome.
In a curious twist, an investigation into GM Phil Miozzo’s background has revealed his graduation picture, raising questions about his persona and expertise. As Mr. Miozzo embarks on his big league journey, all eyes will be on him to see if he can turn skepticism into success or if he will indeed fall short of the lofty expectations he has set for himself.
Prediction for 2025-26: 2nd Place
| Round | Player |
|---|---|
| 1 | |
| 2 | *** TRADED PICK TO KNEE HIGH P.I.s |
| 3 | |
| 4 | Sebastian Aho / John Tavares / Jason Robertson / Mikhail Sergachev / |
| 5 | Shea Theodore / Thatcher Demko / Linus Ullmark |
| 6 | |
| 7 | |
| 8 | Alexander Ovechkin / Vince Dunn / Victor Hedman / Cole Caufield |
| 9 | Adrian Kempe / Logan Stankoven |
| 10 | / |
| 11 | Lane Hutson / |
| 12 | *** TRADED PICK TO TEAM COBRA |
| 13 | Cutter Gauthier / Alexander Nikishin / Yaroslav Askarov / Brandt Clarke / |
| 14 | *** TRADED PICK TO TEAM AV |
| 15 | *** TRADED PICK TO TEAM AV |
| 16 | *** TRADED PICK TO THE KNEE HIGH P.I.s |
| 17 | / |
| 18 | *** TRADED PICK TO TEAM AV |
| 19 | *** TRADED PICK TO TEAM AV |
| 20 | *** TRADED PICK TO TEAM COBRA |
| Round | Player | Team | Traded To On | Dropped On |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Nathan MacKinnon | Col | ||
| 2 | *** TRADED PICK TO THE KNEE HIGH P.I.s | |||
| 3 | Auston Matthews | Tor | ||
| 4 | ** Sebastian Aho | Car | Nov 6 | |
| 4 | John Tavares | Tor | ||
| 4 | Jason Robertson | Dal | ||
| 4 | Mikhail Sergachev | Uta | ||
| 4 | Kyle Connor | Wpg | ||
| 5 | ** Shea Theodore | Vgk | Nov 6 | |
| 5 | Thatcher Demko | Van | ||
| 5 | Linus Ullmark | Ott | ||
| 6 | Mackenzie Blackwood | Col | ||
| 7 | Matthew Tkatchuk | Fla | ||
| 8 | Alexander Ovechkin | Wsh | ||
| 8 | Vince Dunn | Sea | ||
| 8 | Victor Hedman | TB | ||
| 8 | Cole Caufield | Mtl | ||
| 9 | Adrian Kempe | LA | ||
| 9 | ** Logan Stankoven | Car | Oct 29 | |
| 10 | Jacob Chychrun | Wsh | ||
| 11 | Lane Hutson | Mtl | ||
| 11 | Anthony Stolarz | Tor | ||
| 12 | *** TRADED PICK TO TEAM COBRA | |||
| 13 | Cutter Gauthier | Anh | ||
| 13 | Alexander Nikishin | Car | ||
| 13 | Yarolsav Askarov | SJ | ||
| 13 | Brandt Clarke | LA | ||
| 13 | Darcy Kuemper | LA | ||
| 14 | *** TRADED PICK TO TEAM AV | |||
| 15 | *** TRADED PICK TO TEAM AV | |||
| 16 | *** TRADED PICK TO THE KNEE HIGH P.I.s | |||
| 17 | Michael Misa | SJ | ||
| 17 | Karel Vejmelka | Uta | ||
| 18 | *** TRADED PICK TO TEAM AV | |||
| 19 | *** TRADED PICK TO TEAM AV | |||
| 20 | *** TRADED PICK TO TEAM COBRA | |||